on being an adult

I have some tough decisions to make this week. I told my Mom I wished she could just tell me what to do. She said that, of course, she couldn't. I told her it'd be easier that way and she commented, "I think I tried to do that for you as a kid and you didn't like it." Which started my musing.

Ever notice how there are things people try to do for us when we are a young that we hate. For instance: taking a nap. At a young age (5ish) my mom made me take naps. I remember hating it, struggling not to fall asleep. At that age, or maybe younger, my mom would sit outside our door with a spoon for a spanking should we get out of bed. Fast forward to 17 and I LIVED for Sunday afternoon naps. Now, why is it as a child I wanted NOTHING to do with the nap and as a teen (and adult) I LOVE it.

Now, don't get me wrong - I'm glad I have free-will to make choices I want to make...but don't you think sometimes it'd be easier if you had a 'designated decider'? When it's time to decide what's for dinner, just go to your DD...when needing to decide what to wear, who to hang out with, what to and not to do, etc. I need a DD this week!

However, as much as I'd like that, I know that there is no such thing. And as I sit here, giggling to myself about my 'designated decider' position, I realize the impossiblity of it. You see, God created us to make our own decisions. He created us to NEED that. As a child we are not capable of making wise decisions so we have parents who help us through and teach us the meaning of hard work (being forced to do the dishes), getting along with others (being locked outside until the bickering stops), how to rest our bodies (nap time), etc. That way, when we are adults (sigh - and I certainly are one), we CAN make wise decisions.

Fortunately, I have parents who taught me all of these things, and more. They taught to believe in myself and that I CAN make the right decision. What's more, they taught me about a Loving Father to whom I can take my hard decisions and trust that He will show me the 'right' way. That way, even if I end up hurting feelings or something, I can know that I know that I know that I did the right thing.

So -- tonight as I go to bed, I just wanted to share my thoughts -- being an adult is hard. It would sometimes be easier with a DD (see above if you've already forgotten)......but there's always tomorrow -- and I know MY best is yet to come.

Below are the words to the song that has help me up for the last few days...

Oh no, You never let go through the CALM and through the STORM
Oh no, You never let go in every HIGH and every LOW
Oh no, You never let go, Lord, You never let go of me!

--What I like about this is that I know right now God's holding onto me...but when it's all said and done, guess what?! He'll still be holding on to me...That's good!

So - I don't know if any of my musings make sense or if they are simply the ramblings of a tired person......either way - those of you who read this and don't think I write often enough (*cough, cough, philip, cough, cough*)....at least it's something to read that may give you a small amount of insight to what's happening with me!

Night